I'm sorry.


The isolation of a man brings a great clarity to him. Being alone, on a fishing boat in the middle of a dam is great way of clearing your mind...and it's absolutely necessary.

Reflection and feedback is important too in the quest for clarity and growth.


The danger is, that if the feedback comes in the form of criticism from someone you hardly know...it might have a more derailing effect than intended. Furthermore, isolation in fear and anxiety doesn't bring any clarity, it brings more anxiety and a purposeless you haven't seen before. The hole left by criticism without discussion can eat away at one's soul and very quickly become something unimaginable. Let's tear away at the covers then and see what truly lies within:


The past.


“The past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it.”

- Rafiki.


The Lion King was a great movie, and Rafiki's quote made me realize that a bunch of us either still live in the past or judge other people for their pasts. I've been on both sides of the spectrum, and neither one of them is good. At 23 (almost 24) I hope I still have quite a a way to go in life and a few more mistakes to make, but for now I choose to learn from my past every single day. Furthermore I think the way we think about things needs to change constantly for us to experience true growth.


I used to think Teletubbies was the best show there is, but 2 year old Thornton was filled with JungleVites and orange juice at that time; my biggest worry was also whether my spaghetti was served in a Toy Story plate or not. Now, Teletubbies is still pretty cool, but I watch other shows because I've grown up. The same is true with every other thing we go through in life, even the more serious things. Be willing to grow and change when you experience things, it's a good thing to learn from it.


The Present.


“Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift...that's why they call it the present”

- Master Oogway


Another animation, another quote. Kung Foo Panda also taught me to not to dwell too much on the past. So after facing my past and really acknowledging where I come from, what I've done...whether it was right or wrong...and growing in the process, the next step is to live life NOW. Feeling bad about things we've done wrong all the time steals valuable experiences away from today.


Saying Sorry.


Whether the people I've hurt are reading this or not, I feel it firstly needs to be said that I am sorry about what I've done to you in the past. From high school and onward I might have hurt many people knowingly or unknowingly while I navigated my way through life. The reason I'm making this public, is to try and explain the difference in my way of thinking from 2010 to now. The feedback and criticism I mentioned earlier, came indirectly from some people and questioned my position to talk about the topics I am discussing in either my podcast or blog. To you I say: a lot can, and did, happen in 10 years, so me speaking about topics that I didn't necessarily practice back then, should be possible. Sure my past wasn't ideal, but I learnt from it and grew through it all.


Secondly, feel free to talk to me about what bothers you. If you've heard something from someone, somewhere...the chances are that the story had grown by a few tails by now or that my way of thinking has evolved since then. My door is open.


Lastly, to everyone who still feels they have to keep apologizing for their mistakes or live in the past: don't. Life is way too short to not say sorry and move on. It's way to short to keep grudges or choose not to go through pain in fear of change.

Change is good, and it's necessary...so embrace it with open arms.


TF.


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